One of the realities of the medical transportation business I face unfortunately is the passing of people who I have built relationships with over a period of time.

What brings us together in the first place is their inability to get into and out of a vehicle on their own or the difficulties of just getting them from point A to B as safely and comfortably as possible.

Relationships are built; I mean how can they not be? 

It’s one of the things I so enjoy about what I do, learning about their lives while taking them to the Doctor’s office or some test they need.  Seniors are so open and willing to talk about their lives and I find it fascinating to hear about what life was like for them when they were growing up whether it’s locally or someplace in another state. The trips are often short but multiple appointments just mean we have another chance to learn about each other.  Because of this it makes it so much more difficult when you hear one of them has passed away regardless if it was expected or sudden.  Sadly I learned of the passing of three regular patients who I was able to provide transportation for in the past, Joyce, Arthur and Jimmie. Each very different people but the one thing they had in common was a zest for life in spite of their infirmities. 

I’m always amazed at the outlook many of them have, oh sure they are advanced in their years and have lived their lives and probably have prepared themselves for the next step in their journey and it makes me wonder if I will be as prepared to face that next step.  I think so because I learn so much from them and am thankful for that, it’s a gift they give me without even knowing it. 

We all have these opportunities to learn and to receive we just have to be willing to see it when it’s presented.  Our parents and grandparents are always teaching and passing on bits of life lessons to us if only we are open to them.  Remember to stop and gather the flowers of life lessons they give to us - breathe deeply and savor the fragrance because at some point you will have to pass those lessons on.

What happens when mom’s home becomes more than she can handle? 

The stairs Dad has climbed for years feels like Mt. Everest

What about the yard work that they both enjoyed in the past now seem impossible to keep up? 

Perhaps there have been accidents, falls, or even worse- kitchen fires or illness where living alone is more of a danger and risk, or struggling in pain to get to the phone for help? 

It is during these times when we, the adult children, start to think of safer, more convenient options for our elder parent.

So what do we do now?  It is in times like these where many families find themselves in crisis.  In all fairness, our lives are busy, and consumed by family events, and we may only see all our siblings on major holidays, and thus it can be difficult for a family to come together to make many critical decisions, or have the kinds of talks that should have taken place before a crisis resulted.  

More often than not however, you may be one of the millions of families across the USA who's life has been effected by the trauma of a sudden intervention, and you are trying to figure out what is the right thing to do.  They don’t know what they don’t know about what they need to know, and they find themselves having a huge task of packing up Mom & Dad’s family home, selling it, and finding a new place for them to live.   How this process happens can be as individual as your parents' needs or wishes are, and thus, our Decision Guide is designed to help provide clarity for the many families looking for answers in a short period of time. 

Making the kinds of decisions that literally put the lives of your parents in your hands are extremely daunting.  So many adult children struggle with the responsibility and it can become overwhelming.  The good news is that there are many types of professionals who have expertise in senior transitions, who can intervene and be your greatest asset.
Here are a few:

SRES Real Estate Professionals:  A realtor with SRES (Senior Real Estate Specialist) credentials has special training on the real estate transactions of seniors.  They are specially trained to work with families, the distribution of assets, and have key insight on family dynamics, or the emotional challenges that result in selling a long-term family home.  They also in many cases can the coordinate with Estate Liquidators, Estate planning attorneys, Powers of Attorney, etc. 

Senior Move Managers:  A Senior Move Manager can be your best friend in these major life transitions.  They are specially trained to transition Mom & Dad into Retirement Living, and have specialized knowledge to downsize a family home to a new residence- and still make their surroundings feel like a home.  They will work with all aspects of a move, from the planning stage, to the distribution of possessions to family members and friends, the coordination of estate sales, online auctions, and prepare the new dwelling with that special touch, from hanging pictures on the wall, making up the bed, putting away the clothes and stocking the fridge with necessities.

Placement Consultation Professionals:  It is difficult, if one is not well versed in the world of Retirement Living, as well as being untrained in the acceptable physical functionality and financial ability of our elder parent and where they “fit” when it comes to Retirement Living.  There are various forms, which include Independent Living, Assisted Living, Memory Care, Skilled Nursing, Respite Care, as well as Adult Family Homes.  How do we know what the right fit truly is for our parent?  These individuals aren’t giving you a sales pitch, but simply represent the family in their need to professionally assess your parent, and then make appropriate recommendations for their future home.

Elder Law Attorneys:  There is no greater advocate for a senior when representing their wishes than an attorney who practices Elder Law.  This individual specializes in protecting seniors’ assets through meticulous execution of documentation, which outline and provide for seniors financial future, but also their safety from elder abuse, neglect, or the preparing for Medicaid.  For you as a caregiver, these attorneys can help protect both of you in how your parents’ money is spent, and how your own financial assets are not compromised.

Funeral Pre-planning Services:  Prepaying and preparing for a parents' death and burial wishes can be a peace of mind to both you and your parent.  It can assure that your parent will have his or her wishes known and honored.  Today there are many options, including simple cremation services, to funeral homes which will provide everything from a memorial service, to a major event.  They can help administer memorial funds, and donations appropriately.

Whatever the change may be, there are resources to help.  Don't be afraid to consult with these types of individuals to assure a smooth transition moving forward.

In these difficult economic times, coupled with the advancement of technology and home design, more and more seniors have the option to stay in their own homes to “Age in Place” for a longer period of time.  To many seniors, moving away from home symbolizes the death of an era- the letting go of family memories, their independence of making their own decisions, and their ability to remain independent.  In many cases, with a few changes and modifications, staying in the family home can be a viable option.

New businesses are emerging, new technologies, and the professional expertise to ease Mom & Dad’s functionality at home has never been greater. Even as needs increase, Mom & Dad do have options much longer than they used to have. .  In addition, home services have increased to fit lifestyles and budgets. 

First and foremost, a Caveat: Seek out licensed, reputable and insured businesses.  Check references, and Google the business, for user and customer feedback on sites like Angie’s List, Yelp, or ServiceMagic.com.  Remember, the life of your loved one is in their hands. Given these tough economic times, many individuals are putting shingles out to target the senior population. Because it is a growing market, do your research on who you hire. Today, seniors can be victimized through caregiver theft or abuse, maintenance or handyman services ripping them off or not honoring contracts. They attract themselves to seniors with a cheaper price and a smile, and often times this “economical choice” can prove to be devastating on many levels.  

Aging in Place:  Growing exponentially!

The good news is that there are many types of reputable and reliable businesses to serve your senior loved one to live at home. They include:

Home Caregiving Services:  If Mom & Dad need a bit of help around the house, the first tendency is to jump to help them on your own.  A home care agency can provide companionship, help in dressing, showering or bathing.  They can help with cooking, cleaning, and general domestic care that Mom or Dad may have a challenge with.  They can run errands, take them to the grocery store, doctor appointments, and also be a valuable member of the team in keeping you informed on the progress and state of your senior loved one.

Transportation Companies:  If Mom & Dad are living at home, but cannot drive, there are some great independent transportation companies emerging.  According to our Transportation Expert, Dano Smith of Mohawk Mobility in Arizona, many medical professionals such as doctors and dentists are no longer able to, due to liability concerns make key transfers from wheelchair to table or chair.  These transportation companies are well versed in all the things that can happen during a visit to the doctor, transferring to/from wheelchairs, doctor examination tables, or a dentist chair, and can help in this process.

Home Modification and Accessibility Contractors: Seek out contractors who specialize in making homes accessible.  There are also individuals who can survey your parents’ home to advise on where to place grab bars, or what doorways may need to be widened to accommodate wheelchairs or walkers.  They can make furniture recommendations or modifications, or they can give good solid recommendations on some simple things that can be done in Mom & Dad’s home to help prevent accidents, or simply to make life a little easier.  Perhaps your way of keeping Mom and Dad at home is to move them into your home.  Again, with a few modifications, your home can be a wonderful place for your parent to share their lives with the family they love.

Financial Management Companies:  Consulting with these types of organizations, seniors can best manage their financial matters to maximize their assets throughout their retirement.  There are bill paying services, online banking resources, and financial planners  who specialize in senior’s retirement issues. They have the understanding of Medicare and Medicaid laws, and can help sustain their financial well-being.

Downsizers! Seek out Home Organizers, Estate Liquidators, or Appraisal Services:  The less stuff to deal with, the more streamlined a seniors’ life becomes.  Helping seniors to distribute heirlooms to their rightful heirs, and downsizing a home from the clutter can help ten-fold when it is ultimately time for Mom & Dad to move.  For many parents, this is a wonderful time for them to become empowered to leave precious things to their loved ones, and to have them enjoy them while they are still with us.  They gain a wonderful sense of purpose and accomplishment by being a part of the giving process. 

Reverse Mortgage & Long Term Care Insurance:  There are many false beliefs about both of these programs and as they relate to seniors living at home.  These are both viable options, and if utilized wisely and by a solid professional, can enhance and help those still living at home.  A Reverse Mortgage can help fund home care, home improvements, and many extra services to help Mom & Dad finance the help they need.  Long Term Care Insurance will also help if home health services or medical intervention is needed- even if Mom & Dad still live at home. 

Technology:  Every day there are ways, due to the advancement in technology to help monitor Mom & Dad.  Besides traditional home monitoring systems, the advancement in GPS technology can be a significant asset in helping seniors while driving, or installing closed circuit cameras in areas of the home where caregivers and other types of home services may be.  Smart panels can also go into new construction to be set according to the evolving need of your senior, which can help if Mom or Dad wanders off, or doors or gates open suddenly.  Don't forget also, if you can train Mom & Dad to use the Internet, tools like Skype, Social Sites, ECommerce, and Email can help them stay in touch and make purchases that they may need.

Overall, the main thing to seek out, is to make sure that Mom & Dad have less clutter, more space, and a steady stream of resources to help.  Check out our Decision Guide to learn more.